She listened and I learned

Today was a hard one. My father passed suddenly just a few weeks ago and this was my first Father’s Day without him. The last two years on Father’s Day I was lucky enough to travel the 2,000 miles to see him in Tennessee. I was planning a surprise trip this year and then he passed before  I could finalize details.

My heart just broke today. I would think this week that I was over the grieving and then it would hit fresh. While my inner joy will surface, the in the moment is rough.

At church today, singing some of the very songs that I had sung with my dad on my last visit. On that visit, I had the precious moment of holding him as we both cried because he was so sick and we were pleading with the Lord for his health. Our please and cries turned to praise and peace. Today the memory flooding me, it was all too much and I had to leave the building and get away from the songs.

Along came my sweet spirited sister in Jesus. Now normally I would have such an anxiety over showing myself so vulnerable, but she brought such a peace with her !

My friend sat with me and listened to me talk and cry. I shared so much I didn’t even think to share, simply because she listened. She had the sweetest spirit of comfort and assured me in the simplest of ways. She did not talk over me, as I likely would have done, but she waited and smiled. Oh her beautiful smile.

I learned so much from that exchange today. I learned by example to listen lovingly. I learned that a hug can bring the calm, instead of anxiety I often feel when crying. She just waited and I felt so connected to the here and now, and the grief just melted. We were laughing and sharing and I dusted my self off and we went back inside.

The message today….was on connecting with one another. A real connection. God had given me a perfect physical understanding before the message today and it was so sweet.

Thank you my friend, for stepping out, for teaching and loving. The fruit you share, will blossom and spread to others! You are a treasure!!!!

Facebook has become my coffee shop

Years ago, when I lived near my closest friends, we did everything together. We would phone chat, visit every other day in person, write those snail mail letters and find any way we could to share every moment.

Being raised as an only child, I had my gals to share everything with. I never had those family moments of ‘remember when’ with a sibling, all my ‘remember when’ moments are with my besties.

We (hubby and I) always had a house full of friends, when the children were younger. We would host one holiday party or birthday event whenever we had the chance.  Youth groups were at our house, and whenever anyone wanted to have a gathering “Dan and Shaey’s House”  was often the nominated location.

Until one day, Facebook came into my life. Here I could see how my friends were doing in an instant. I could easily share with the nearest and dearest all of my personal happenings, that of course I know they want to know about, and forget that another gaggle of people are seeing every update as well.

I can see how a friend is doing and send a quick reply, checking on her, and it’s as if she is in the room.

Now normally, this may not be a bad thing for some people, but for this girl it is and I will tell you why.

Most of my closest friends, do not live near by. So updating, sharing and checking in on Facebook is so beneficial when best friends are a thousand miles away. But this introvert  or rather Fibro flared mama that is exhausted 24/7, makes very little time for relationships in the here or now.

I know lives changed, and we all get busy, but I have completely switched how I relate to most people.

In essence Facebook has become my coffee shop. I share and read the happenings of others there, converse and ‘gossip’ there and even am encouraged. I struggle with energy these days and the ‘doing’ of life. So when I realize the phone no longer rings, or the invites have slowed considerably, it is then that I realize that this computerized friendship world, has robbed me of the face to face interactions.  I must make an effort to connect face to face with the ones in my town, in my state, or dare I say it… in my own home.

I will always turn to technology when I can to stay in touch with the far ways, it is a great form of staying connected.

But  I must remember to not let Facebook(or technology) be my only. For it is too easy to forget the simple pleasures of expression, touch, and  the gift of being together in person.

I have decided, I will look up more often from the screens, and I hope to find  someone else smiling at me when I do!

Finish the RACE

I just watched a very moving video where a teen helped carry a fallen competitor over the finish line of the state track meet. The ending was the most profound and I will be posting the link at the end of the blog for you all to see it and be blessed.

The actions of support for the one team member got me to thinking of the race in my own life.

I am called to complete and finish ALL that the Lord has for me to do. I am to stand in my faith and not waver. Often I get bogged down by my limits or life circumstances that can be dizzying, and want to give up, but God promises to be my strength and to be my aid as I finish what He has before me. When I am burdened He carries those burdens for me.

There are times I have put things on the shelf to refuel and that can be healthy, but never my faith in the moments of rest, always trusting that He will accomplish what He sets out to complete in me. I can not listen to the lies that bombard my mind that I won’t get there. I have had definite times that I just wanted to give up and not keep striving for that goal, but then He sends a reminder and I am lifted and ready to go on.

I want to reach the destination He has for me. I desire to touch the lives He has for my harvest. I want to remember to STAND in FAITH always and I want that moment when I can give a collective sigh and say;

” YES, I MADE IT! ”

Challenge this day my friends: Evaluate the races in your life that you are meant to complete but desire to give up on and remember, you are NEVER alone!

2 Timothy 4:7-

have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, and I have remained faithful.

Psalm 68:19-

Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens. Selah

The LINK I promised 🙂 Blessings!!!
http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/highschool-prep-rally/ohio-runner-stops-state-final-aid-fallen-opponent-100722161.html

Get Equipped and Stay Equipped

 

  I am a double sided coin when it comes to conflict in my life.

  If I care enough about something or someone I am all in, all the way, going to fight to the end. This woman can be a roaring lion if I am protecting those I love.

 On the other spectrum, if I feel something is not worth the wasted energy or if it feels to heavy to handle and the conflict is concerning me,  I will run and not face it. I find that I am willing to fight no holds bar when another person or issue is being attacked that I care for, but rarely if I am the one being attacked or hurt will I fight.

God has taught me that I need to be equipped to fight this illness, to fight the targets coming against my thoughts, to fight for my relationships, to fight for my finances, to FIGHT and  not lay down and be trampled over. Just because humans are not attacking me, does not mean there is not a battle going on. I need to be prepared to face it. I need to be able to say, I AM WORTH it and the victory is already mine..

 I become better equipped as I spend time praying, worshiping and praising, and reading his word. I equipped myself with the armor of God as a teenager and there are times I have neglected that armor or not used it for it’s purpose. God gives His children everything they need to equip themselves for each day. We just need to apply those pieces of equipment to areas of our lives. 

A soldier going into battle without his weapon will not fair well. I will not fair well if I try to fight fatigue and illness by only applying part of my tools instead of all of them. I can conquer the broken relationships if I have the mind of Christ and not a heart of fear. I can mend broken pieces if I love rather than run.

There is a place and time when you do not let yourself be bowled over and stomped on. It is important to handle those moments in a healthful way rather than a destructive way.

In order to walk in fullness of joy, I firmly believe we need to grasp that we HAVE and the tools to obtain it have already been supplied!

Challenge this day my friends: It is time to equip ourselves and stay equipped. I have not found a scripture yet, that tells us to lay down the armor of God. Or to run from the things that you fear or want to just lie down and give up on. 

Ephesians 6:11-18

Put on the FULL armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.

For our struggles are not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark worlds and against the forces of evil in the heavenly realms.

Therefore put on the whole armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground and after you have done everything to stand.

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled to your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace.

In addition to all this take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.

Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit which is the word of God.

And pray in the spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayer and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

(NIV)

 

Whom shall we please?

It has been awhile since I have blogged. I went through a season of trying to be there and please people, then I went through a season of not caring and trying to please myself, and finally realized my own self needs to get out of the equation and I need to please only one.

Even though I receive a blessing when I please a friend or my hubby lifts me up with his praises when I have caused joy in Dans heart,  I realized anew how important it is to please God first and foremost in my life. We can never please the human fully, we will always fall short. I for one know how fully I can fail at pleasing everyone. I also know that I can never please my own self, I am always reminded of how human I am and that my own desires can change with the wind.  I can not seek after my own own desires and be fully blessed.

It is natural to want to please humans; we want to be seen as kind and friendly, or as the brave one, the smart one, the pretty one, the talented one, the best friend, or even the ‘rebel’ for those that it pleases.

I absolutely love when my people in my life are pleased with me. But when I stop and pause, the bigger question is, am I pleasing the Lord to the best of my abilities? Where am I applying the best of my heart? I know we are called to please God above man or self and I must stop and ask; ” am I doing that?”

I have had people ask me, “how do you know what is pleasing to the Lord?”

This my friend is answered only by seeking Him first. Spending time in prayer and getting to know the Lord through His word, in both your head and your heart and applying that word to your life.

You can not have fullness of joy if you are rushing around trying to please man ( this includes your own self desires.) The happiness or the joy will only last as long as the moment lasts. Then you are left with the silence and the consequences of doing things your own way. There is not a spiritual joy that you get the moment to revel in when you are doing things God’s way and you are blessed with HIS blessing on your life.

Seek FIRST the kingdom of God. Seek His will, His way and what would be pleasing to HIM. Then the life will reap the benefits of living in God’s outpouring joy!

Even when things don’t seem to be going right, if you are seeking Him first, your heart will be full. He is just good that way !

Challenge this day my friends: Seek to do that which pleases the LORD first

Proverbs 16:7- When a man’s way please the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with Him.

(NKJV)