Yes Lord….Desire of my heart

My word for 2018 is YES LORD. He has placed in me to seek His will first and to YES LORD all that He lays on my heart.

Psalm 37:4 (ESV)- Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.

In my prayer time today, I had some desires rise up and then I felt deflated during prayer. I asked the Lord where this was coming from and I saw clearly;
Yes, the Lord gives us the desires of our hearts but I realized lately that when the desire rises up, the lack of it leaves me discontent. My desire has become my focus. I am missing the BIG picture of delighting myself in the Lord!!!!

Also, I often over look that He gives us the desires of our hearts when we line up with His will for our lives. When we delight ourselves in the Lord and keep our focus as it should be, His will then becomes the desires of our hearts. It is then that He is faithful to see our desires fulfilled.

I have been walking in some discontent with a big desire of my heart not fulfilled. Now this desire may or may not line up with the will of God ( I honestly don’t know yet). Because, I have been so busy focusing on the desire and not seeking the WILL in it I have been left spinning between my want and lack of having it.

Through my prayer time today, my spirit jumped when I realized that somewhere the desire of my heart crossed over to being the full focus of my heart, time and attention.

Often during the day, that desire rises up, and then discontent follows because it has not happened yet. I ask myself, how often have I prayed and sought the Lords will first that day? How often have I sang His praises that day? Is it more often than this petulant child whining for her desire to be fulfilled?

God’s message to me today, in this year 2018, is to take my focus off of my desires and set my heart in tune with Him again. My peace comes and I know He has everything covered. I do not need to obsess over the I wanna’s. Be anxious for nothing He says, and I am ready to say…

YES LORD.

Philippians 4:6- “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with THANKSGIVING let your requests be made known to God.”

Supplication ( asking or begging, earnestly or humbly )

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Worthy-Worthiness-Worth

 

I have been hearing the word worthy, thrown around a lot this last week. Many of the scriptures I read state that HE is worthy of praise. But what does the word say about us being worthy? What is worthiness?

Definition- Worthiness: The quality of being good enough, suitable or the quality of deserving attention or respect.

Can we as christians be worthy ? Can we be good enough, suitable, deserving attention or respect? Is being born again enough to make us worthy?

 

Colossians 1:9-14 ESV-

And so, from the day we heard, we have not ceased to pray for you, asking that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, So as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; being strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy;  giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in light.  He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, 14 in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

 

I feel strongly that God cleanses us and makes us worthy when we come to Him and repent, turning AWAY from our sin. We are new in Him.

But we can walk in a life that is unworthy and unpleasing to God. We have that choice. We need to continually walk in  a manner that is pleasing to him to be worthy (suitable), We can not continue to walk in the filth and garbage and expect that we will feel worthy. Each and every thing we do contrary to the word of God is not pleasing to him, it is not bearing fruit that is good if we are not doing good works.

If we do works that are contrary to the word of God our fruit will be contrary to the word of God. Rotten and filthy. Not a good fruit to bring joy, endurance and patience. Not a fruit that is worthy to bring to the throne.

You can walk any way you would like but when you walk contrary to the way of the Lord and then you claim to be His child, you are going to feel the guilt and shame. It is going to follow you in all that you do, there will be a seperation.

There is no BIG crime and LITTLE crime in the Kingdom, every thing that you fill your life with that is not good fruit bearing will produce bad fruit in your walk in some way.

I am not talking about a mess up, a slip up moment, I am talking about when you WALK in a life that goes against the word of God, you will not be upright and worthy of Him in your mind. He sees and knows the real you, the side of you that others do not see.

You can’t feel worthy when you are walking in a way that is not pleasing to the Lord.
This is conviction in your heart. A call to repent and turn away. When you turn away , you are not to look back at what you did, that was the old you.

SO if you repented (turned away from your old sin) and you  came to the Lord and gave Him your life, walking up right with Him, yet you feel so dirty and unworthy still,  THAT is the enemy. That is condemnation, making you look back at who you were and what you did. The enemy trying to make you feel dirty and unworthy to walk with the Lord.

You are called to not pick up your old identity. You are made whole and new in Him. You are enough, He knew you before you were born, He knew every misstep and misdeed and still chose to call you to Him, cleanse you and love you. He feels you are enough. We give thanks to the Father because HE qualifies us.

If you want Jesus and ALL that He has for you, you must turn away from your old man, turn away from the walk of sin and destruction, not just when it suits you but completely.

So these are my thoughts tonight. I know many may disagree,  some believe you can do whatever you want and walk with the Lord, but this is my heart on the matter.

Point blank … Sometimes it is true, you are unworthy….. but you have the choice to make it a lie; repent and walk worthy in the Lord.

 

The Lion within

25399027_10214870973832875_8040969796702007604_n                                                           Proverbs 28:1 The wicked run away when no one is chasing them, but the godly are as bold as lions.

There are so many battles we face moment by moment and day by day. I have had seasons where I just wanted to throw my hands up and take my place under the covers. But God said NO MORE. He has called me to fight my battles ahead and when I am weary He says, “discover your lion within and let out your war cry!”

“But God,” I say, “there is no strength in me, I see no lion but rather a kitten wanting to nap the days away.” To which He replies, ” NO MORE, I am in you, that is a lie, let out your war cry!”

I see a picture in my mind of Aslan. A soft and gentle lion. Loving to the children visiting Narnia, but the moment He is ready for battle he let’s out his powerful mighty roar.

There is a shifting in the atmosphere with that strength. That roar changes things!

I have begun to exercise my faith and let out my war cry. I am beginning to say “no more will I listen to lies. No more will I sit quietly while the enemy tries to steal my peace.”

I have a choice on where my mind focuses, I have a choice on letting my roars overtake the whispers of the enemy. I am bold, I am courageous, I can do ALL things through Christ who gives me strength.

Challenge this day my friends, will you let out your war cry? Will you take your stand in the battle and win your ground over your spiritual enemies.?

The Lord is mighty,  the Lion within.

 

 

Do it anyway… with Rejoicing

We have had so many road blocks in the past few years at my church in the freedom aspect. Lives just torn down and discouraged with a heaviness that was tangible throughout the body, week after week. We would see some little glimpses of breakthrough and then a door would lock in our faces.

Recently there was some great advancements, the keys handed to us and we kept unlocking door after door. Families and relationships restored, jobs opening up and healing over different people. The joy bubbling forth in new ways, vision and passions being revived, hope abounding and the dancing, singing, art and musicians broke free. We were standing on reclaimed territory.

It was not very long before new and bigger physical battles arose. I feel God has taken us to a place of great strength spiritually, so the physical was under attack. Wearing us down, discouraging and all together bubble bursting.

Our pastor was hit in a very big way, my household has been hit in a very big way, the worship leaders home has been hit in a very big way. The list goes on and on and on.

We had begun new ministry direction and all the wars raging around us, knocking the leaders out, could have stopped the new opportunities in the tracks.

That is when God spoke very clear to me, “DO IT ANYWAY!”

I replied, “But God, I don’t know how to lead prayer, and worship.” God said, “DO IT ANYWAY!” So we had prayer and worship the very night the pastor had surgery. We felt something shift in the atmosphere. Rather than discouraged we were doing this without the leadership, I felt like a warrior, going into battle and taking ground, step by step by step. Things were shifting and happening and great victory came forth.

There have been many other opportunities that the Lord has told me lately… “DO IT ANYWAY.”
It does not matter that I hurt, it does not matter that I don’t know how, it does not matter that obstacles keep rising up. I WILL KEEP REJOICING. I WILL KEEP SINGING. I WILL KEEP OPENING DOORS FOR OTHERS TO HAVE OPPORTUNITY TO DO SO. I WILL DO IT ANYWAY!!!!!

My husband spent yesterday, all day in the hospital. We have more tests to pursue concerning his health.  The finances are in a horrible place as He has been out of work, had surgery and the bills are mounting around us. My pain was screaming like ever so often this morning and I wanted to stay home. But God said “DO IT ANYWAY,” So I went to church. I wanted to paint, but I have limits, but God said, “DO IT ANYWAY,” So I painted. I wanted to dance, but my body hurt and others were around, and God said “DO IT ANYWAY,” So I danced.

My JOY was filled to the brim. My circumstances faded in the background and like a little child dancing, painting and singing, there was no other thought than the one that I was doing it for. In my situation I was doing it for Jesus. Praising His mighty name despite all that surrounds me.

.  This is the painting that came forth during my worship.
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The message shared this morning after worship and my painting, was JOY.

I had no idea.

JOY JOY JOY comes to mind again and again.

The definition of REJOICE:
FEEL OR SHOW GREAT JOY OR DELIGHT!

Regardless of my situations around me, all that is flooding against me, in worship Rejoicing over my Lord and showing great delight; My joy bursts forth and that is exactly where I want to be.

1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18  Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Zephaniah 3:17
The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.

Clanging cymbals

 

I Corinthians 13:1 “If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.”

I have read this scripture many times over the years. But recently as a friend of mine was hurting in her anxiety and depression, and I was shouting out God’s goodness and how He pulled me through, I realized in a moment that I was not loving her. I was not meeting this friend where she was but trying to shout out how the Lord pulled me from the pit.  I wanted to see this same glorious victory in her life,  but there is a time when if all I am doing is shouting out joy, joy, joy… I can be a clanging cymbal.

It may not be comforting to a friend that is watching her life crumble around her, to hear,  ” I have been there, this is what you need to do!”
While I do believe in encouraging and edifying my sister and I do believe it is so important to sing the praises of my Jesus when He has shown me His joy,
There is a time and place for it.
Love is patient, kind, does not boast, not-self seeking. Am I being kind, patient and not self seeking when I want to hurry my friend through her burdens rather than walking by her side? I want her to be full of joy, but is that because I am uncomfortable with her hurting?

The word says there is a time and season for everything. There is a time to mourn but JOY comes in the morning. Am I rushing my friend to her morning, before God has completed the work in her? Am I a discouragement, when she is not seeing the joy that I am proclaiming and as she sits there while I am dancing about blind to her sorrow?

If I had been a clanging cymbal to you my friend in the past as I rejoice in my joy. I am sorry. I want you to have joy in abundance, and I want to share how I reached it, but in your time, when you are ready. God has begun a work in you, and He will complete it, in HIS time.

Lord grant me the wisdom to know when to be quiet and walk beside and when to SHOUT out your glorious JOY. For I don’t want to be a clanging harsh noise to the ears of those around me, but a song of praise stirring within the spirit of those hurting. Help me to know what is needed in the moment.

 

 

Enough

writingforjoy 021

I am enough

He makes me enough

I am what He has called me to be

I will accomplish what He lays before me

I have all that I need

He will guide my hands

He will guide my feet

I am enough

He makes me enough

I am what He has called me to be

 

These words came to me in song tonight as we drove home from the Oregon Coast. We had taken a quick day trip and over and over, God showed me His amazing abilities through His creation. If He created such amazement, why do I doubt what He can do in me?

God  gave me the words… An artist thinks with his soul. I don’t think in my natural brain when I am creating. But let me tell you as soon as I am done, all my own flesh natural thoughts come my way. “It is not good enough.” ” I am so embarrassed by showing this side of me.” And on and on my thoughts will come, each time I complete something the Lord lays on my heart, and I doubt the sharing.

His words to me today ring so true; An artist thinks with his soul. I need to let my words of destruction and discouragement  get out of my way. They need to stop plaguing me after the fact.

I will meditate on the words of this song He had given to me, and I will be thankful that I am just as He has created me to be. Who am I to deny that what God has done is good? I am enough in His eyes. I am capable in His view and I will no longer live the lie that I am unable. I will do, what He lays before me and that is enough.

Pray for others

I have a friend and every time I greet her and am embraced in one of her hugs, I just get a wonderful sense of peace. She can calm my fears with a simple prayer and encourage my heart when she shares Gods truth.

A few weeks ago, as she gave me a hello hug, I saw a picture for her. This picture stuck with me for a while, and when we had the prophetic paint night I painted it real quick for her.

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I saw clearly that as my friend covered all of her hurting and broken loved ones in prayer, the spirit of God bubbles forth within her and He brings about victory to those that are surrounded by seas of sorrow.
They turn from dead and dying to life full of the Spirit.
While my friend may feel many times her prayers are not answered, God says “they are not answered yet, but I know they are there! I hear your prayers. In my time you wills see the overflowing waters of life. Keep praying.”

So as you are praying for victory over a loved ones situation or life. Rest assured the Father hears! He knows your heart as you come to the throne room on behalf of others.

Recently I was woken from a dream that someone very dear to me was in danger. I had no other knowledge or thought on this path as I laid to sleep the night before. But God woke me,and I knew I was called to pray. I don’t know the outcome yet, but I can rest in the knowledge that God heard my cries and already He has begun a work protecting those loved ones.

Don’t give up. Keep pushing on faithful one. Pray for others.

 Colossians 1: 9-13

For this reason also, since the day we heard of it, we have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that you will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience; joyously read more.
giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in Light. For He rescued us from the domain of darkness, and transferred us to the kingdom of His beloved Son,

 

Ephesians 3: 14-21  

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man,
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen.